As he walked by the Sea of Galilee, he saw two brothers, Simon, who is called Peter, and Andrew his brother, casting a net into the sea — for they were fishers. And he said to them, "Follow me, and I will make you fishers of people." Immediately, they left their nets and followed him. As he went from there, he saw two other brothers, James son of Zebedee and his brother John, in the boat with their father Zebedee, mending their nets, and he called them. Immediately they left the boat and their father and followed him.

~Matthew 4:18-22

Discerning the Call

Hello, Saint John’s! My name is Emily Fenwick (she/her), and I have the honor and privilege of serving as Pastoral Intern here at Saint John’s this summer. I was born and raised here in Austin; this fall, I am beginning my third (and final!) year at Austin Theological Seminary (ATS), where I am working towards my Master of Divinity (MDiv) degree.

In seminary, we talk a lot about calling and vocation. In the application to ATS, we were asked to describe our “call” to ministry; and the MDiv track is designed to help us discern how we might faithfully respond to this call and live into our vocation. This language of “calling” has challenged me in some ways, because it seems to imply a kind of specificity that I have not necessarily felt in my own life. I have passions and interests—many of them— but I have always found it difficult to articulate a specific call, particularly as it relates to my life with God. I know my call is to love God and love my neighbor—and this can be lived out in any number of ways! But then what brings me to seminary and to serving in the church?

On June 7, during the first Reaffirm class here at Saint John’s, we practiced Lectio Divina (a contemplative and meditative approach to reading scripture) with Matthew 4:18-22. As I meditated on this passage, what stood out to me is the way Jesus transforms the vocation of the fishermen into a life of discipleship, making use of the skills which they had already cultivated throughout their lives and helping them apply these skills to their new lives of discipleship as “fishers of people.” In meditating on this, finally, something clicked for me. I love theology and I care deeply about peace and justice, but these things in themselves do not necessarily constitute a “call to ministry,” at least in the “official” sense. Yet, as I continue to follow Christ, I feel that God is transforming my vocation—my interests, my skills, my studies—into a life of discipleship, and that process of transformation is what has brought me here.

I grew up as a pastor’s kid in a nondenominational church. As I started seminary, I began to find that I did not fully resonate theologically with the traditions in which I was raised, which started me on a journey to find a denomination and church home that more closely aligned with my theological convictions. Luckily, I didn’t have to look far before finding Saint John’s. As I navigated this discernment process, the verse “you will know them by their fruits” rang in my head (Matt. 7:15-20). As soon as I walked into Saint John’s for the first time, I felt the deep love and care that emanates from this church family, from the friendly faces that welcomed me at the door to the benediction that sends us into the world to be the Body of Christ for others. I am so grateful to have found a church home here, and I am so looking forward to growing in relationship and learning from you all as we continue to “create a community where God’s love changes people and God’s people change the world.”